The Ultrasound

I was so anxious the night before my Ultrasound. I was glad to have the season premiere of Downton Abby to watch and get my mind off of feeling anxious and excited. This morning my friend Nicole came over to watch the kids and I zipped into the shower to take a quick one before my appointment. My Grandma called me to ask if I would like her to give me a ride to my appointment and I was so happy to have someone to nervously chat with while I waited for the ultrasound instead of nervously picking my fingers til they bled. I have a habit of doing that. :/

We got to the clinic early so we popped into Starbucks to grab a quick coffee before the appointment. I ordered my Grande Cinnamon Dolce Latte but this time it was decaf. I got myself off of caffeine for the pregnancy. Its healthier to be off of it completely even though the Dr says I can have up to 200mg of caffeine a day. I would rather just end it completely. It was nice spending the time with my Grandma, we don't get a lot of time just the two of us anymore with my little ones, so the calm conversation and harmless gossip was warmly welcomed.

The clinic waiting room felt like a Scandanavian sweat house. I was wearing a turtleneck and a sweater and drinking hot coffee while nervous though, so that might have been part of it. I was called back into the room and disrobed from the waste down for the vaginal ultrasound. The baby is too small to see well from an abdominal ultrasound yet. I got out my camera to video the ultrasound for the IPs. I was so excited to see one very healthy baby and the Dr was so nice to explain what everything was in the video, and I even got a video of the heartbeat! He said I am 6 weeks 2 days and and Due September 1st 2014.

I was so so excited. Even though this is not my first pregnancy, it is my IP's first child. So all of the excitement that comes along with the first is happening again for me! I will say that I definitely notice a major difference with this pregnancy emotionally. With my own children I felt a spiritual and emotional bond from the moment I saw two lines on the pregnancy test. With this pregnancy, even after seeing a heartbeat, I don't feel that emotional or spiritual bond that I felt with my own babies. Which is GOOD!! I don't want to feel bonded to a baby that is not mine. I'm just casually observant of the fact that this surrogacy is very different from a natural pregnancy where the child is genetically mine. I am nothing but overjoyed for my IPs.. I sent IF the videos of the ultrasound and can't wait to hear from IM  (she was asleep when I sent them) what she thinks!!

My Grandma was so excited to have been there to see the ultrasound. Its so fascinating, and different.

Now I go back in on Jan 20th for my 8 week ultrasound and then I will be released to my Kasier OB for the duration of the pregnancy. Yay!!