The Transfer

On November 10th 2017 ( The Marine Corps Birthday as my husband told everyone..) we had our embryo transfer! I got there at 11:30am, and started all the paperwork. It was relatively simple and fast. We verified that we would be implanting only one embryo, and got to see the photo of the little boy. His embryo was already "hatching" as they call it, which is the stage before the amniotic sack is formed. It was so cool to see that!! You could even see the small cluster of cells that would eventually form into the baby. Science is freaking amazing, bottom line.

I dressed in my gowns and hair net, wore my super fuzzy socks to keep my feet warm, and sat in a small room with a nice warm heater. It was all about keeping me warm and relaxed. I walked into the procedure room and IM and IF were already seated and gowned, ready to be with me while their baby was placed in my womb. IM chatted with me pleasantly about life as we waited for the Dr to place the catheter, and then for the embryologist to bring in their little boy. He was place into my womb like "A poppy seed in a jar of peanut butter." as my nurse put it. We all laughed at that.

After the procedure was done, no pain or discomfort for me at all, I used the bathroom and lay down for 30 minutes with a tube that had warm air pumping right into my bed. Kept me very warm and relaxed. I had a cup of tea and we all chatted about our families and life. My IPs are so amazing. IM had a moment where she wanted me to know that whatever the outcome of this transfer, she was beyond grateful to me and to my family. IM had the pain of going through 17 failed transfers, I definitely understood her worry and also her deep gratitude, but I was so hopeful for them.

After the 30 minutes they walked me down to Jason's truck that waited for me outside. They gave me a gift bag filled with goodies including tea and a rose plant! They even gave my mom a bag of chocolates since I would be spending my 24 hour bedrest at her house. Much quieter and relaxing there than at my own home. Haha!

I am now 8 days past my transfer and have had positive pregnancy tests since 6 days!!!! YAY!!! Tomorrow is my first blood beta where they know my exact number for HCG count. I can't wait to report high numbers!

Play Date at the Park

Today my new IPs met us at a local park. I had a matinee showing of my play at 2:30, so we made our park play date for 10:30am. This was the first time we would see each other in person. The first time we met was over FaceTime on our phones. I could see IF and their son walking on the dirt path ahead of us as Jason and the kids and I walked over from the parking lot. They had baseball caps on, and were watching the drones flying around an obstacle course someone set up on the large field at the park. I could see IM, and she must have sensed us coming because she turned, her blond hair whipping slightly in the breeze, and waved joyfully at us. I waved back. Hunter was on Jason's shoulders and Emma held onto my hand and to a stick she gathered along our way.

As soon as we saw each other we embraced. I introduced Hunter to their son, and soon the kids were off running on the playground. My IPs brought us a bag of fresh pastries from their local bakery, and fruit from their farmers market. It was so sweet of them, and the croissants were crispy and flakey on the outside and light and fluffy as clouds on the inside.

We talked about life, halloween plans, kindergarten, 1st grade, how Jason and I met, family on all our sides in Minnesota, city living, and all kinds of stuff. We talked about the IVF process, and hospitals. It was so fantastic because there was not even 1 uncomfortable moment. No time where I thought to myself "what on earth do I say next?" Finally at about 12:20 I said we needed to go so I could prepare for my call time at the theater of 1pm. We hugged and said our goodbyes at our cars, and look forward to seeing each other again many times. Its a beautiful beginning to another incredible surrogacy.

When you know, you know.

Last week I was having a really tough time. Summer is coming to a close, and we are getting ready to head back to school and my work, and along with that comes stress. My son has been struggling with his Tourettes, and on Thursday it all just kind of had me in an exhausted funk. Luckily my mom, who was setting up her Kindergarten classroom for the year, needed help so I packed up my kiddos and we spent the day playing and organizing in her room. While I was there I got a phone call that said "SAI calling.." my agency!! I answered and sure enough there was Ann with that tone of voice I always knew to mean "I have something exciting to tell you.." Sure enough she had a profile to send me! The second she told me the IPs names, my arms covered in goosebumps, and if you're a long time reader of my blogs you know that I attribute those goosebumps to mean that the Holy Spirit is near by. I imagine the warmth of the spirit near me jumping up and down silently going "Oooo just wait Corinne, it's gunna be good."I laughed and told Ann "You could honestly just send the profile b/c I already have a really good feeling about them." I waited a few minutes for my email to go *bing*, and then opened their PDF file that had beautiful photos of the couple, their young son who is Hunter's age, and their incredible story of how they have come to need my help. I read the whole thing all the way through and didn't need more than a half second to think "Yes..this feels right." We set up a Facetime meeting for Saturday the 12th at 1:30, and I knew it was going to be good.

This morning before my meeting with the new IPs, Jason packed up the kids and Max (our dog) and headed out for a day of hiking. That way I could talk to them uninterrupted, and have some time alone to think about my conversation after we were done. At 1:30 on the dot they called and I were all 3 smiles and hellos. It was fantastic, the whole conversation flowed very naturally and easily. Nothing felt forced. We talked about my previous surrogacies, and how different they were. We talked about what my expectations as a surrogate were in terms of communications, medical care etc. We talked about what our kids loved, and about school starting soon. We ended the conversation and must have emailed Ann at the same time, agreeing to move forward together!! So I guess you could say, as we do in the surrogacy world..

It's a match!!

Journey number 3 has begun. <3

The breath before the plunge.

Have you ever stood at the edge of a large rock, with the intent of jumping into a lake? Or perhaps the edge of a pool, or on a cliff above a swimming hole? Wherever you jumped from, do you recall the moment before you leapt?

I can imagine the pause before the plunge. My toes moving slightly in the dust of the rock beneath me, my eyes surveying the large body of water and people near me before I took that final deep breath and leapt into the air, physically and metaphorically giving up control of what happens next, and relying entirely on the laws of gravity and the protection of a creator to guide me to safety.

I always imagine the time before I am matched with a new couple like this. My paperwork is all now fully submitted, and today was when I was notified that my profile was now considered active to receive matches. This moment for me is such a positive and fun exercise in faith. I have no idea who will be sent to me, and that idea is somewhat thrilling! I really aim to open myself up completely to Creator in these moments and allow him to use me entirely for whomever he knows needs my help. It's a feeling that's hard to describe. I've learned how to understand God's methods of communication with me. I felt it when I read my first set of IP's profile..and again when I read the profile for my last IFs. It's this overwhelming and undeniable feeling of "YES." and now I know how to hear it.

So today is day 1! Any day now I can find out that there is a couple interested in asking me for assistance. I love it, and I have grown to enjoy the uncertainty. Looking back on my past posts I always talk about how hard this part is. It's interesting to see how my view of this transition point has changed since 2013. I can't believe I've been doing surrogacy for 4 years...3 babies. This is such a blessing. I can't wait!!

In the words of DJ Khaled..."Another one."

Hi there..it's me, and I'm doing another surrogacy.

"Wait...is she serious? She's going to do ANOTHER surrogacy?"

That's right people. I'm on the journey to another surrogacy. I wanted to write this blog because of a few reasons, mainly because I want to explain why I'm back.

I've decided that I'm not ever going to say "I'm done" ever again. Why? Because it commits myself to an idea that I feel in a moment, in a season, and I may change my mind. Which I've done. ;)

I would love to do a sibling journey for any of my previous surrogate parents, but I don't believe any of them are at a point in their family lives where they want that and so no..I don't believe this is a sibling journey. I wanted to carry for another Gay couple again, but now that my profile is submitted, I am open to whomever Creator sends to me.

Ive had two children of my own, three surrogate babies, and now I want to do another one. I am requesting only a single embryo transfer this time only because twins was SO hard on my body and my family. I LOVE my surrogate twins and I'm so happy I had the experience, but I now know I cannot do it again. I'm also waiting to do the transfer until late October or November so I can have the baby over summer and not miss work. So here I am.. ready to bring a soul earth side. I already feel like it will be a boy. Lets see how it goes eh?!

Welcome back to the ride...

Shipping breastmilk can sometimes get awkward...

I've been posting my awkward shipping experiences on Facebook and someone suggested I put them all down in one place. So here they all are! In sequence, and over the course of a month. ;) Enjoy!

At UPS dropping off the first shipment of frozen milk for the babies, there's an 18 year old kid at the cashier. He takes my package, weighs it, and starts writing up the info for shipping.

Kid: ..and contents?

Me: Breastmilk.

Kid (shocked): So..uh..ok. *blushing*

Me: *enjoying watching This poor kid turn beet red and fill in the info about this breastmilk shipment.* So is my info saved now for further shipments?

Kid: Of more breastmilk?

Me: Yyyyyyyyyup. *smiling*

Kid: Ya it should be saved...I hope. *blushes harder*

Hahahaha awwwwwwkward.

Awkward breastmilk shipment story part 2...

Imagine..if you will..a packed UPS. Joe the construction worker is picking up packages, Asian lady in a visor needs to buy tape, and an elderly couple is arguing over who needs to sign for a notarized DNR paper. 18 year old kid is working again, but luckily he is busy with Joe the construction worker, so (we'll call her Philipino Auntie), Philipino Auntie takes my box of frozen milk...

PA: Whats in the box?

Me: Breastmilk.

*18 year old kid is smiling at the cash register..Joe the construction worker looks over and quickly away.*

PA: Oh..ok..you need box?

Me: Yes please.

*PA goes to get a box so Persian Owner with a bad hair piece takes my info while she packs the ice chest..*

Persian Owner: Ok..contents of the box?

*every time I say breast milk, PA pulls tape and Persian owner can't hear me and asks again..*

Me: *shouting expecting tape noise...but there is silence* BREASTMILK!

Persian Owner: Oh..ok. Breastmilk.

*18 year old walks by with a box smiling again*

Did you know your shins could sweat?? I didn't know you could sweat from your shins... I swear you can't make this shit up. I think I need a beer.

Awkward breastmilk shipment story..part 3.

I walk in, already sweating, and Philipino Auntie and 18 year old kid are both on their cell phones, Persian owner with the bad hair piece is speaking in Farsi on the phone presumably to his mother since the only word in Farsi I could understand was Mum. He winks at me..(yes please let's make this even more awkward shall we?)

18 year old kid puts his cell phone down to assist me. Great. He starts taking my info again when I hear (let's call him "Student from Ellis") Student from Ellis walks in behind me..

SFE: Hi Mrs Oestreich!!!!!!

Me: 

😳 (this can't be real life.)

*turning around with a smile*

Me: Well hi there!! You're out with your mom, how fun! *turning back around I give 18 year old kid a look that can only be described as "If you ask me what the fucking contents are, I will reply with 'your intestines'." And luckily he gets the hint and never asks...

Ladies and Gentleman I believe we have reached an understanding....finally. So I finish my shipment and walk sweaty shinned to the car, grateful that I didn't have to say/scream "breastmilk!" In front of one of my students...

Awkward breastmilk shipment story part 4...

Well it was bound to happen, but today I had to bring my kids with me for a milk drop off. I carried the box in and told the kids to stand near me while Philipino Auntie helped me with my shipment. 18 year old kid was no where to be found..luckily, and Philipino Auntie who was obviously DONE with the fact that it was a Friday afternoon began to ring up my shipment.

PA: Contents?

Me: (Thinking to myself "really?...we're gunna do this?) Breast milk.

PA: Fresh silk?

Me: Breast Milk!

Emma begins dancing and spinning around the store singing "Breast milk!! Breast milk!! Breast milk!!" At the top of her lungs, at which time the 18 year old kid walks in from break. He has a smile on his face as he avoids eye contact with me on his way to the back of the store.

Me: Sigh.

PA: Anything else Ma'am?

Me: (Thinking to myself..a Xanax?)

Hunter then begins spanking me as we walk out he door singing "What chu gunna do with that big fat butt?! Wiggle wiggle wiggle."

😑🍼. the things I do for these twins... Lol

Awkward Breastmilk shipment story Part 5...

We walk into UPS, 18 year old kid is working along with Philipino Auntie. PA is busy taping someone's artwork to ship, so 18 year old kid smiles awkwardly as I walk up with my ice chest.

Me: Hi.

18 year old Kid: Hey. Phone number?

I give him my number and he begins taking all the measurements and weight for shipping. PA finishes her packing and comes to help with my shipment. She tapes up the box loudly as I attempt to give my info again to the 18 year old kid..

18 year old kid: So... Same contents as usual?

Me: *hallelujah chorus starts playing in my head* Yes.

PA: BREASTMILK. (She shouts this loudly, proud of herself for remembering what I have been shipping for weeks now...people in line are now staring at us.)

18 year old kid and I both turn exasperated at PA. Seriously?

18 year old kid: I think I'm going to give you the box for free....no charge. (Smile)

Me: Thanks.

Hahahaha

Awkward breastmilk shipment story part 6....

Philipino Auntie and 18 year old kid are working. They've opened the store computer to play Mozart's cello concerto in A on YouTube and its playing loudly. There is no one in the store except myself and my kids. Luckily. PA is on the phone with someone named Amanda who needs to ship something in an oversized box, so 18 year old kid helps me out again.

We've comfortably accepted that avoiding eye contact is really probably the best way to make this multi-weekly transaction less awkward.

We go through the whole process.. Measurement, phone number, same contents miss? Sign here.. Slide card.. And I can hear the music building... The Mozart in the back ground is crescendoing and my anxiety is subconsciously building. As if on cue, the music peaks, 18 year old kid hands me my receipt, and just as I believe I will finally escape here free of awkwardness, Philipino Auntie hangs up the phone and turns around to see me saying "Hey!! Breastmilk!!"

😑 Apparently I am not the only one who has assigned nick names. Lol

The Birth Story: Sometimes NOTHING goes as planned..

On Tuesday July 5th, I noticed that my contractions were coming pretty regularly since about 4am. They weren't super painful, but they were enough that by about 5pm I arranged for my kids to go to my mom's house, and to go into Labor and Delivery to be checked. I was 2cm the last time they checked me a week prior, so when the Dr said I was 4cm I knew something was going on. From the moment I walked through the doors of the Hospital my contractions started getting super painful very quickly. I remember thinking "Thank God we're already here!" The Dr decided to wait an hour and monitor me, then come check me again to see if I had made any progress. Meanwhile my IFs were still with family in Jackson Hole WY from celebrating the 4th of July. We called them and told them what was going on, and they anxiously awaited that hour until we found out of things were progressing or not.

After an hour of breathing through some very painful contractions, I was checked at a 5cm dilation. This was labor. I was admitted, and given a steroid to help with the babies lungs, and again placed on magnesium to give the shots 48 hours to work.

It was pretty awful, I didn't want to get any epidural yet because we were trying to put off the labor, and the magnesium again made me hot, and dizzy, and nauseated. By Wed morning 3am I was on an epidural so that I could get some rest. They performed an ultrasound and both babies were over 4lbs, A was head down and B was transverse with potential to turn vertex. The magnesium slowed my labor down when I had reached 6 cm. At that point they were not going to let me go home because of the risk that my labor could quickly progress and my waters could break when I was away from the hospital. My epidural was removed and I was moved to Anti-Partum. I was still unable to eat or drink while on magnesium and was so starving that I ended up throwing up the first thing I tried to eat after magnesium was removed. Luckily I was able to hold down a bowl of oatmeal. From Wed to Saturday I had continuous contractions. It was every hour, to every 10 minutes, and very painful. I was huge, and uncomfortable, but the most amazing feeling was that my IFs were by my side after a last minute flight from Jackson Hole to SF. They held my hand, and sat by my side for hours and hours at a time. They were so supportive. My husband had support in them as well, they all went to dinner and lunches together and with our kids too. It was truly a family affair.

On Saturday my contractions started picking up again. My nurse kept coming in to adjust my monitors and would see exactly how painful these contractions were and coming on about every 6-7 minutes. Jason was with me and we were watching Agents of Shield, pausing so that I could breathe. My nurse came back in and said my Dr was coming to check me.. I was a 7.5!! Once the decision was made to move me to L&D, they moved fast. A minute later there was a gurney by my bed for me, nurses were packing all of my stuff, and Jason was following close behind as they wheeled me to my delivery room (even though I would be delivering in the OR.) I met my nurse in L&D and we started talking about what to expect, when I would like my epidural etc. I requested the epidural soon as I knew they needed it in in case of an emergency C-Section.

The epidural helped so much and I remember being so incredibly tired, that when the anesthesiologist came in to explain the epidural process while in labor, my eyes were literally closing and I was dreaming in those fraction seconds. I don't think I have ever been so tired. When they left, I rolled to my side and slept. We all did. My IFs fell asleep on the couch, and Jason (bless him) stayed awake in his chair watching me sleep, looking for any sign of discomfort or my water breaking so he could get the nurse. He finally fell asleep at one point, and I was awake because my contractions were now coming every 2 mins and strong enough that I could feel them break through my epidural. They came in to give me some more medicine and checked me. 9cm! They wanted to wait a little longer and left me to rest some more. About an hour later I knew I was ready to push. My water never broke, but I had that incredible urge to push. They checked me, I was a 10 and ready to go! My IFs kissed me goodbye and waited outside double doors while I was pushed into the OR. Baby A was still pretty high up, but I was a 10 so my Dr asked me to give a practice push. "Whoa! Thats good ok stop!" Hahaha every time. My Drs always say, "oh but he's so high up still you have a while..." Nope. I know my body. I'm so happy my Drs listened to me, Stanford had a few other Drs talking to me trying to convince me to just do a c-section since baby B was larger and transverse, but I knew she would come down. I insisted on attempting vaginal. I'm so glad I did because Baby Boy A came out in 1 1/2 pushes and 1 minute, and Baby Girl B came out 3 minutes later and head first just like I knew she would.  The whole thing took 5 minutes total! While pushing out baby girl, the Dr broke my water... poor timing on her part because just like a water balloon ruptures, my waters broke and all over her. I apologized and all the nurses laughed and my Dr started cracking up. "Rookie mistake!" she told me later. It was so funny. I really wished I could have seen my IF's faces when they met their babies for the first time, but I understood after labor started that it would have been way too crowded in that delivery room. There were 20 Drs and nurses, not including Jason and myself and the two other little ones I brought into the room.

Ethan was born at 12:42pm at 4lbs 6oz on July 10th
Violet was born at 12:46pm at 5lbs 7oz on July 10th

 Ethan is still in the NICU but he is getting better and better every day. :)Violet graduated today from the NICU to the intermediate Nursery! She has tried some nursing twice with me, and hasnt been on the breathing machine for a while. YAY!  I am now home and resting and recovering with my family, and blessed that I get to see my IFs every day when I bring milk by the hospital. It was the most beautiful thing seeing them now as a family. Made every single hard moment worth it. Every pain, every discomfort, every time I wanted to cry and give up, because this pregnancy was difficult, totally worth it when I saw those beautiful babies in the arms of their daddies. I am so incredibly blessed that I have the family that I have. My village rallied around me in 100% total support, watching my kids, feeding my husband and family, and cleaning our home and doing laundry. Wow. We were called and visited, loved and enfolded in arms of strength. I never asked my family to sign up for this surrogacy with me, I expected to do this and shoulder the burdens as they came, so to have them step into action for myself and for my family as well as my IFs... Just amazing. So grateful.

Ethan

Violet

I truly gained family in my IFs. I am so happy for them, and it brings me such joy to see them as a family. This is their beginning. I will always be grateful that they trusted me to carry their little cuties. I will always love those two little munchkins, and their incredible fathers.

This was my last surrogacy.. I am now retired as a surrogate and I feel completely and totally happy.

Please view the video my husband took of my delivery below. He started filming after they got my legs up in the stirrups. Beware of the water balloon explosion of amniotic fluid haha... its not gory or anything.. just funny.